News and views on latest British prisoners of Iran. April 1, 2007

Picture: Eminent Kazakh Journalist Borat endeavors to analyze the latest crisis.

 

To the utter surprise of the Iranian President, Mr. Ahmadinejad……

Hmmmm… dear friends, I have a very good suspicion that the latest Persian-British battle is going to heat up the Blogland or Blogistan, as we call it in my home country Kazakhstan. We have already seen some blogs from our friends Simon and Fuzzy.>>>> Oh, I’m sorry I think that poor young woman in tattered clothes (Jeans) needs some help, I will be back soon and meanwhile I will let this Eskimo guy do the job.

Ok….. this one is getting scary as the news trickle in. Not that attacking Iran was never on the cards. The Iranian defiance is legendary, matched only by North Korea. But the latter has reliable support from Russia and China and moreover any attack on North Korea would be considered as the bombing of China and Russia’s own backyard, not only politically but also geographically. But I wonder and wonder what these Iranians got in mind. These things evoke so many ideas, concerns and mixed feelings in my brain. I remember I posted a comment on Simon’s blog and then breathed heavily, looked at it and said to myself, ”Hmmmm.. that looks like a blog.” So, I shamelessly copy- pasted it, added an odd sentence and published it as a new post on my Word Press blog, under the tongue in cheek title, ”Satanic Iran and hypocritical Angels”

It would be a tragedy if Iran finds itself getting bombed by Anglo- American forces. In the long term the consequences would be bad as both sides will spiral into new phase of mistrust and hatred. Just look how news headlines sound like now: ”US ready to strike Iran on Good Friday‘; ‘Iran fears U.S. attack in summer: Israeli General’; ‘Iran accuses US jet fighters of violating airspace’; Even the opinion page of the British newspaper, The Telegraph came up with strong Fox News style editorial, ”If Iranians hate us, let them also fear us”.

I have neither the resources nor the interest in analyzing how many nautical inches British ‘’sailors” were within or outside the Iranian territory. But they must have been awfully close. I suppose, so very often the armies of peace and freedom do get curious about their less free and not so peaceful counterparts that they want to have a peek inside their backyards. It happens a lot more than you could ever imagine. It is not the first time that the British curiosity or concern for the enslaved Iranians got them in trouble. Even in 2004 British ‘’servicemen” were booked by Iranians as BBC so kindly reminds us: ‘Iran releases British Servicemen’ .

Digression: BBC can be amusing though. It has some liberal bleeding hearts but it will go to sleazy extents to hide them: ”BBC pays £200,000 to ‘cover up report on anti-Israel bias’

Digressing again a bit: I think the myth that the young Arab and Iranian ‘’students” do not support their government and believe in the ”western freedoms” should be discarded. Surely, lots of young Iranians are liberal like young people anywhere in the world. But they are most likely to grow and merge into their national identity, culture as they grow older or whenever some outsider will threaten their country (Protests at UK’s Tehran embassy). Not long ago, I remember watching an Interview of Salman Rushdie (on C-Span) at some conference in New York. He had his audience enthralled and laughing out loud with his witty remarks. But he said some imbecile things about Islamists that 80% of people loved and applauded. He said- with chuckles and grins- that Islamic fundamentalism or backwardness results from their fear of sex and also that Iranians can be won over if Americans flood them with MTV, Ipods, Western music etc. I will not analyze these remarks but as for the sex bit I have seen plenty of cultures, civilizations and tribes on National Geographic and Discovery channel that seem to have nudism as their lifestyle and as for sexual liberty and promiscuity: some of them remain unmatched even by Byronic standards. And yet, they are anything but modern or progressive.

Objectively speaking, I think Iran can have its dignity and save itself from any useless military conflicts by gracefully releasing the wandering Britons as it did in 2004. That would only win Iran the praises of international community. But I very much doubt that Iranian leaders would consider it easily. Stupidity is such a sad thing when confused with patriotism. I fear conflict is coming up. And it will all be the same old story: armed conflicts, killing of civilians who had nothing to do with the conflict and the genesis of new terrorists, suicide bombers; more military strikes, more terrorist attacks. A vicious circle that everybody gets sucked into till the whole world starts to cry and bleed.